The Mission

This is a guest entry by Yiling...

Who is currently in school, with a tummy man, a penguin, a dancer and a 'definitely'. Penguin is asking me to hurry becoz her lappie is gonna run out of battery.. what is happening now is that, I will be introducing a how-to approach (asset?) on how to tame your girlfriend.

1) Profile the girlfriend. -What is the problem with her? a)Too demanding? b)Too pretty? c)Too wild? d)Too smart? e)Too unreasonable? f) No sense of direction?

2) Gang up with your friends.

3) Put the girlfriend in a vulnerable position. a)At your friend's house b)In front of your family c)Overseas

4) Plan (with your friends- they tend to be less soft-hearted than you will be(I think....))

5) Action.

For Type (a) girlfriend... If she demands for money, give her a sub-card if you are rich. Then change the account that is linked to that card. When she calls and screams over the phone because her Prada purse and Estee Lauder foundation bounced off the sub-card, tell her you are arrested for printing counterfeit money, and add in the classic line "I think our journey ends here... *sniffs sniffs sob sob*... the police would need to confiscate all items charged to the card".

If she demands for more 'fun' in bed, call your best friend.

If she demands for more attention, turn her to the tv.

For Type (b) girlfriend... If your girlfriend is too pretty, empty all the low-fat yogurt carton, low-fat cereals, muesli bars, etc and replace with Full cream/ fattening ingredient-type of snacks. Note: Make sure they taste and look the same.

For Type (f) girlfriend... She is probably looking at the wrong direction (you.)

Okie this is a bad demonstration... it was just a crappy entry that was inspired by a conversation between some friends... herh...

Okie, while we sulk and curse at the number of presentations and projects that are thrown to us this sem... lets take a minute to celebrate the fact that WE ARE GOING TO BANGKOK END OF YEAR!!!?!?!!!!!!